Superficial details are not important

Ben was the kind of guy who believed in love at first sight. He was a hopeless romantic, captivated by the idea of finding his perfect match in the most serendipitous of moments. But Ben had a peculiar flaw: he was easily distracted by the unimportant characteristics of potential partners, often letting superficial details cloud his judgment.

One evening, Ben attended a friend’s dinner party. As he mingled with the guests, he noticed a woman with a radiant smile across the room. Her name was Sarah, and she was a journalist with a passion for travel and storytelling. Intrigued, Ben approached her, hoping to strike up a conversation.

“Hi, I’m Ben,” he said, extending his hand.

“Nice to meet you, Ben. I’m Sarah,” she replied warmly.

They chatted for a while, and Ben found himself genuinely interested in her stories about her travels and the different cultures she’d experienced. However, as they continued talking, he noticed a small scar on her left eyebrow. Instead of focusing on their conversation, he became fixated on the scar, wondering how she got it. His curiosity about the scar overshadowed the meaningful connection they were building.

Eventually, Sarah noticed his distracted gaze and politely excused herself, leaving Ben standing alone, chastising himself for his lack of focus.

A few weeks later, Ben met another woman named Lily at a local coffee shop. She was an artist, and they immediately clicked over their shared love of painting. As they sipped their lattes, Ben couldn’t help but notice the slight gap between her front teeth. He became so preoccupied with that tiny detail that he barely paid attention to the stories she was sharing about her art exhibitions and creative process.

Lily, sensing his distraction, smiled politely and told him she had to leave for an appointment. Ben watched her walk away, frustrated that he had let another potential connection slip through his fingers because of his fixation on an unimportant characteristic.

Determined to change his ways, Ben sought advice from his best friend, Mark, who had been happily married for years.

“Ben, you’re getting distracted by things that don’t matter,” Mark said. “Scars, gaps in teeth—those things are insignificant. What matters is who these people are, their values, and how they make you feel.”

Taking Mark’s words to heart, Ben decided to give it one more try. He joined a hiking club, hoping to meet someone who shared his love for the outdoors. On their first group hike, he met Emily, a nature enthusiast with a contagious enthusiasm for adventure. They walked together, discussing their favourite hiking trails and dream destinations.

As they hiked, Ben noticed that Emily had a quirky habit of humming to herself. For a brief moment, he felt his old habits creeping back. But this time, he reminded himself of Mark’s advice and focused on the joy he felt in Emily’s company.

They continued to hike together, and Ben found himself falling for Emily, not because of or despite her quirks, but because of the genuine connection they shared. They laughed, shared stories, and bonded over their mutual love for nature.

Months later, Ben and Emily stood at the summit of their favourite trail, looking out over a breathtaking view. Ben realized that for the first time, he wasn’t distracted by unimportant details. Instead, he was completely present, cherishing the meaningful relationship he had finally found.

And as they stood there, hand in hand, Ben knew he had learned an invaluable lesson about love and the importance of seeing beyond the surface.