I aspire to be a positive influence on everybody who wants to be positive

 

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Your thoughts are the solution to every stressful event you encounter

Which lane is going to get me where I want to goStress is caused when your mind tries to find a resolution to a problem when you do not have the information or power to solve it.

Example: If you consider stressful situations are like being stuck in the middle lane of the traffic jam like that white car.

Unknowable: You don’t know what’s causing the tailback or how long it will take you to get to your destination. You don’t know whether the lanes on either side of you will go faster or slower if you move into them.

What you know: You know the traffic jam will not last forever, eventually the traffic with thin out and you will get moving forward again.

  • Another thing you know is, being stressed about your current situation is not going to help you in any positive way.

stress can be relieved through acceptanceDuring those stressful moments in your life the only logical option is to accept the following. You are where you are meant to be and you will arrive at your destination when you’re meant to arrive.

I’ll leave you with a couple of lines that employ common sense.

  • If your actions don’t relieve your stress, you’ve got to learn how to change how you think about the cause of your stress.
  • Stress is something you embrace, you have the power to release it.
  • Stress is clearly the result of not thinking clearly.
  • You should never stress about what you cannot possibly know.
  • Whatever you accept will not cause you stress.
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Believing in yourself is good for you

When you believe in your future, nobody can take it away from you.

bumble beeAccording to all known laws of aviation, there’s no way that a male bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground, however, the male bee doesn’t care what humans believe so he continues to fly effortlessly along.

That’s one valuable lesson people can learn from the humble bee: Don’t listen to people with limited beliefs about what’s possible.

You may be talented, inspired and motivated, however, if you don’t believe in yourself, those traits will only get you so far. Remember, your belief in yourself is your super power, it gives that edge over everybody else who is competing with you.

How do you believe in yourself?

  1. As long as your beliefs help keep on believing.Accept yourself for who you are today.
  2. Look back on everything you have accomplished in your life. For example; if you have passed one exam in your life, you’re capable of passing every exam you will take in your future.
  3. Talk out loud to yourself, tell yourself how energetic, powerful, strong and courageous you are. If you feel uncomfortable letting other people hear you, put a pair of earphones in and they will think you’re motivating somebody using your mobile phone.
  4. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Believe me when I tell you, every leader makes mistakes all the time, they’re just better at hiding them.
  5. Learn from everybody you admire. Take the traits you admire most about them and adopt them to suit your purpose.
  6. Adopt a positive attitude towards everything.
  7. Live in the moment, if something isn’t going right for you at any given time, don’t cling to that moment, let it go. There will be plenty of moments when everything will go right for you.
  8. Listen to, and accept compliments from other people with gratitude.
  9. Don’t pay attention to insults. They’re normally given by weak people who think they will make them strong.
  10. You are not alone.
  11. Share your opinions. However, don’t expect everybody to agree with you.
  12. Don’t allow your past to anchor you to the past.
  13. Believe in your destiny, you were put on this planet for a good reason.

I’ll leave you with a couple of my favourite quotes:

  • “Every saint has a past, every sinner a future.” ~Oscar Wilde.
  • “We are what we believe we are.” ~C.S. Lewis.
  • “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt.
  • “Never stop trying. Never stop believing. Never give up. Your day will come.” ~Mandy Hale.

 

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Karma what goes around comes around

Karma what goes around comes aroundHow other people think and act will determine what they attract into their lives (their karma), your thoughts and actions will determine your Karma.

Cursing your enemies may sound like a fun thing to do; “May you get the runs on your wedding night.” or “may you get an itch you can’t reach, are two popular Irish curses. However, they’re your thoughts and if you wish those things for somebody else, you’re really wishing them for yourself.

You’d be better off wishing for them to experience a wonderful happy and healthy life, and wishing for them to win a fortune every year they’re alive. Now, that’s something worth receiving.

How Karma works: If you work on the theory that your karmic force is an all-powerful 14-month-old baby, who doesn’t know right from wrong, positive from negative, good from evil and whose ability to understand language is almost non-existent. All they understand are images and emotions. That’s why the information you’re sending to your karmic force needs to be clear.

If you’re forever cursing people, your karmic force will guide you to find more people to curse. If you’re wishing happiness for people, it will look for people and events to bring more happiness into your life. I’ll leave you with one final thought;

If you knew how powerful your thoughts and emotions are, you’d never concentrate on a negative one.

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You do not have to be labeled an influencer to influence people

Regardless of what you think about yourself you will influence people as you travel through life.

You will be a teacher. If you’re a good teacher you will teach them how to learn, not what to learn.

You will be a chef. If you’re a good chef you may inspire other people to cook, if you’re not a good chef, you will inspire people to diet or eat out.

You will be a cleaner. Everybody at some point is expected to clean up after themselves, literally and metaphorically.

You will be a diner. From the moment you’re born you need to eat. The habit will not change until you no-longer need more energy.

You will exercise. You will exercise from time to time, if you look like you’re enjoying yourself, other people may take up that form of exercise. If you look like you’re torturing yourself, they’ll wonder why you exercise at all.

You will think. Some people will think a great deal more than they need to, that’s life. Some people will base their thoughts on the great minds who have preceded them, they will expand the knowledge of the human race. Some people will use their thoughts to create conspiracy theories to give some meaning to their lives.

You will inspire. Your actions and words will inspire people to follow in your footsteps or go in a completely different direction.

You will motivate. Every time you ask somebody do something in a different way, you are motivating them. If you show them how the changes will be good for them, you will be a positive motivator. If you just tell them to do it your way, the opposite is true.

Remember.

  1. You don’t have to be labeled a teacher to teach.
  2. You don’t have to be labeled a chef to cook.
  3. You don’t have to pay for food to be a diner.
  4. You don’t have to labeled a sports person to exercise.
  5. You don’t have to be labeled a philosopher to think.
  6. You don’t have to be labeled inspirational to inspire.
  7. You don’t have to be labeled a motivator to motivate.

As I mentioned in the title, you don’t have to be labeled an influencer to influence people, all you have to remember is you’re influencing people by interacting with them.You cannot avoid this unless you are determined to live life as a hermit, and even if you chose that path, the delivery people will be influenced by you.

The best thing you can hope for is that you’re influencing the people you interact with in a positive way.

I’ll leave you with one final thought. You will always do far too much to be labeled correctly.

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What you see is not always accurate

A picture is but a moment in time and doesn’t necessarily portray what is actually happening. Before you continue please have a look at the picture and tell me which car has a bad driver?

The majority of people will think the driver of the car that’s taking up two spaces is the bad driver, however, the majority in this situation would be incorrect.

The bad driver is actually the driver of the car beside the silver car.

“How?” I’m glad you asked that question. Originally, the driver of the silver car had parked in one space and his partner had been able to get out of the car and go into the shop without any trouble.

While the driver’s partner was in the store, the other car arrived and parked beside the silver car but as you can see, that car didn’t leave enough space so that when the driver’s partner came out she wouldn’t be able to get into the car.

The driver of the silver car decided to be courteous to his partner by moving the car so there would be enough room for her to enter the car.

Of course, people who didn’t witness the entire story unfold will think the guy driving the silver car is just a bad driver.

The lesson to be learned from this situation is, before you take sides in any story, make sure you know who’s responsible for the actions you’re witnessing because it’s not always obvious. I’ll leave you with one old adage.

There’s always at least three sides to every story. My side, your side and the truth.

For those observant people, you’re correct, the driver of the silver car could have moved into the free space that half of his car is in, maybe he is a bad driver after all. Who knows? I didn’t stay for the entire show either.

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Are there too many people for social distancing to work?

In the last 120 years the population has increased by approximately 6 billion people.

During this time period we experience two world wars, countless other wars, the Spanish flu and the emergence of other killer diseases such as cancer, yet the world’s population continues to rise regardless of the hurdles it has to overcome.

The Spanish flu in relation to the population at that time was the biggest killer, it was estimated to have killed 10 percent of the world’s population and was only contained through strict social distancing rules.

The question that has to be asked now is, are there too many people on the planet for social distancing to be an effective way of fighting the current pandemic?

Will we have to wait until our doctors and scientists discover a vaccine or better still a cure before the world returns back to normality?

I’ll leave you with an interesting question.

Is it more profitable for pharmaceutical companies to come up with medicines to fight viruses than it is for them to come up with medicines that cure them?

My answer is. Although scientists have the ability to break down and analyse every disease that exists, I believe the common cold will be around for a long time to come.

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Happiness is keeping your mind and body in harmony

You may think you can’t separate your mind from your body, however, that’s not true, the majority of people rarely keep the two together.

The truth is, people let their minds wander around Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, LinkedIn or any number of online social media platforms.

If they’re not online, they’re looking at the clouds, black cats, four leaf clovers, rainbows or any other means by which they can determine how their life is going to unfold.

When they’re finished with those mediums, they send their minds into the world of television to escape from a reality they’d prefer not to face.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with doing that, as long as you’re aware of what you’re doing and why you’re doing it.

The question is, will you find happiness doing any of those things? I believe the answer is a resounding no.

“Why?” Because, happiness only truly exists when your mind and body are in total harmony.

If you would like to experience this sensation, go for a walk anywhere there’s nature present and listen to your breathing for five to ten minutes. You’ll hear a great deal more than your breath. (The more you do it, the easier it becomes.)

Remember to leave your electronic devices at home. If you bring the fake world with you, you’ll not be able to hear the real one. I’ll leave you with an interesting quote that sums up a lot of people’s life.


“People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own souls. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” ~Carl Jung

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Insults are not funny to the people being insulted

Insults are not funny to the people being insulted, however, those people are prepared to laugh when they think the jokes are aimed at somebody else. And who can blame them, if you take all the fun out of life, what’s left?

“Don’t take life too seriously, you’ll not get out of it alive anyway.” ~Elbert Hubbard

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Interview questions are not designed to find unique employees

If you want somebody to follow procedures, invite them for an interview. If you want somebody who’s going to make a difference, invite them for a conversation.

The following questions and answers are my idea of having fun at an interview, not how to make a good impression. If you used some of the answers, there’s a very good possibility you’d not be asked to attend a second interview. Enjoy.

What’s your greatest strength? The ability to ask intelligent questions.

What’s your greatest weakness? Answering unintelligent questions.

Tell me about a time you went above and beyond? One of most difficult questions you can ask somebody who always gives 100 percent.

What can you bring to the company? Everything you need in an employee.

How would you describe yourself? Sarcastic, funny, realist, honest, optimist, pessimist, angry, soft, irritable, happy, annoying, grateful, arrogant, active, mannerly, respectful, trustworthy, perfectionist, well-balance and loyal.

How do you work under pressure? There is no pressure when you understand what you’re doing.

What’s your dream job? Lottery winner of course.

What interests you about the role? The salary.

Tell me about your experience? I’ve found most managers have little or no idea about motivating the people they manage, however, I’ve found they will do what they need to do to impress their own manager.

What does customer service mean to you? Good customer service is never discussed, excellent customer service is rarely discussed. Bad customer service is at the centre of every discussion.

Why are you interested in this position? My dream job hasn’t turned up yet.

How do you handle conflict in work? I explain why I’m right and get on with the job at hand.

How do you prevent conflict in work? I don’t explain why I’m right and get on with doing it the wrong way.

What skills do you bring to the job? The ability to learn.

Are you overqualified for the role? Is there a right answer to this question.

Why are you leaving your current position? I can’t get my current manager promoted.

What makes you unique? It’s either the tattoo on my right leg or my sense of humour.

Where do you see yourself in five years? Hopefully in the local pub having a few pints, covid-19 willing.

How do you define success? Spending five years in a position without my manager finding out I stopped listening to them after two years.

Can you explain the gaps in your resume? Yes, but I’d prefer not to, I really want this position.

The best advice you can give anybody going to an interview is. Only say as much as you need to, nothing more. Remember, whatever is not said cannot be judged.

Honesty is not always the best policy where interviews are concerned.

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Finding contentment requires lots of stops and starts

The person who finds contentment will have stopped chasing after everything and everybody who interferes with their peace of mind.

You’d think that everybody should be able to find contentment quite easily because who doesn’t want to live in peace? The truth is, most people don’t want contentment, they think that’s for people without ambition. The following quote puts that thought in perspective.

“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.” ~Jim Carrey.

So, if contentment is not achieving everything you’ve dreamed of.  What is contentment? Contentment is an emotional state of satisfaction that can be seen as a mental state, maybe drawn from being at ease in one’s situation, body and mind.

Yes, contentment lies within the attitude you have towards yourself and your situation in life. You’ve got to learn to be at ease with your place in the world. There’s many a person who will climb the hill in front of them only to find another hill waiting for them if all they want out of life is meaningless accomplishments.

“At this moment, lying on the bed, sick and remembering all my life, I realize that all my recognition and wealth that I have is meaningless in the face of imminent death,” ~Steve Jobs.

Contentment means that you’re at peace with yourself regardless of where you find yourself on any given day. An introvert can learn to enjoy moments of extroversion if they believe that’s exactly where they were meant to be at that moment in time. Some other examples of contentment are.

“He was most content when he was sitting by a warm fire on a chill winter’s evening with only his dog for company.”

“She was most content when she listened to her children playing happily in the next room.”

“They were at their most content when they were swimming in the ocean when the only sound they could hear was the waves crashing onto the distant shore.”

“She was most content when she was surrounded by her life-long friends, having a glass of wine and reminiscing about the good times they had shared.”

The thing to remember is, one person’s idea of contentment could be another person’s nightmare. Introverts and extroverts do not appreciate the same situations. And that’s why there isn’t a one size fits all, however, the process for finding contentment is similar for everybody.

How to find contentment. Finding contentment revolves around two processes. Things you need to stop and things you need to start. I have listed them to make them easier to read, however, the order you carry them out is entirely up to you.

Things to stop.

  1. Stop chasing after things you do not need.
  2. Stop listening to people and information you do not agree with.
  3. Stop trying to impress other people.
  4. Stop seeing positive traits in people they don’t possess.
  5. Stop judging people.
  6. Stop believing people are talking about you.
  7. Stop criticizing yourself.
  8. Stop looking for perfection.
  9. Stop thinking anybody is better than you.
  10. Stop blaming other people for your troubles.
  11. Stop worrying about death. (Yours or anybody else’s.)
  12. Stop letting your emotions control your behaviour.
  13. Stop thinking you know why people do the things they do.
  14. Stop trying to control people or situations where you have no power.
  15. Stop interacting with people who undermine you.*
  16. Stop living in the future. If you’re always thinking about what you’re going to be doing in 5 minutes, you’ll be forever living in the future.

Things to start.

  1. Start appreciating the things you already have.
  2. Start expressing your opinions regardless of who’s listening.
  3. Start doing things that impress you.
  4. Start exercising your mind and body.
  5. Start appreciating the power you have over yourself.
  6. Start allowing other people to do as they please. If you’re not pleased with what they do, let them go.
  7. Start forgiving yourself.
  8. Start taking responsibility for your life.
  9. Start remembering everything you’ve achieved. (Learning to walk is a huge achievement.)
  10. Start believing everybody is trying their best to live a happy life.
  11. Start developing an open mind.
  12. Start living in the now. Be aware of each breath you take.
  13. Start remembering the times in your life when you were content.
  14. Start understanding that for now, you’re good enough just the way you are.
  15. Start having realistic expectations, or in other words, don’t have expectations about anything. Be a witness, not a judge.

Remember. Don’t mistake happiness for contentment, happiness comes and goes, contentment lasts forever. I’ll leave you with a couple of quotes from people who understood what contentment was all about.

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Bernard Baruch

“The day you become your own best friend is the beginning of a wonderful life.” ~Alexander Strong.

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go.” Dr. Seuss.

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” ~Lao Tzu

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Words without context are meaningless

“We suffer more often in imagination than in reality”. ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca.

Unnecessary suffering. That’s the real problem people face on a daily basis, too many people let their imagination create anxiety. They allow words to have more control over their thoughts than is needed.

Some of those words are, pandemic, cancer, death, murder, Suicide, mental illness, drug addict, financial disaster, racism. The thing to remember is, they are only words, if you don’t know the context behind the words, that’s all they ever will be. Words.

Let’s put some of those words into context.

Pandemic: the current virus sweeping the globe is dangerous, however, if you consciously social distance at all times, wash your hands, avoid touching your mouth or nose when you’re out shopping or on any other trip. Wear a mask when it’s not possible to ensure social distancing, you will be safe.

Cancer: It’s another word that creates fear and panic, however, over the years doctors and scientists are getting to grips with this disease, the survival rate is on an ever upward spiral. If somebody is unfortunate enough to pick up this disease, their fate is in the hands of their doctor and they’re fate. Worrying about it is not going to help. And yes, I know it’s easier said than done but that’s where people need to have faith in their fate.

Death: a fate that’s waiting for everybody. If the natural order prevails where the person is born, lives a long and happy life, then departs. It’s relatively acceptable, however, when the natural order is not followed, it causes anxiety. I only thing I can say in this situation, it cannot be undone.

Murder: it happens, however, the percentage of people who die on the grand scale is very low. I don’t believe anybody should commit suicide, however, when you hear of a murder/suicide, I always wonder why they couldn’t be brave enough to depart on their own.

Suicide: I believe it’s the side effect of the next topic.

Mental illness: I personally believe there should be more psychiatrists than any other practitioner in the medical system. Mental illness should be discussed as easily as the common cold. People should be saying, “I felt a little mental last week.” And the person they’re speaking with will reply, “that’s a coincidence, I had the same thing the week before.” The old saying, “when you shine a light on a shadow, the shadow disappears,” is very apt, nobody should be allowed to suffer in the darkness.

Drug addict: these people want to escape from reality, their reasons are more than likely the ones they brought with them from their childhood. Didn’t deal with it then, not going to deal with it now. If you’re lucky you had a good childhood and good parents who taught you how to deal with the problems you’ll face during your lifetime. These people didn’t have one or both of them.

Financial disaster: There are many different levels of being poor, I have absolutely no pity for somebody who has to sell their 10-bedroom mansion to live in a bungalow. All I say is, welcome to the real world. When I hear of people who don’t have enough to eat, I wish the governments of the world would find a peaceful solution to their conflicts and spend the money they save feeding the world’s poorest.

Racism: it seems to be the reason behind everything these days. If you don’t agree with somebody from a different culture, you’re racist. I believe that any headline that has a colour to differentiate between people is creating a division in our society. There should never be a story where is says, black man shot by police or white man shot by police, it should read. “Man Shot by Police.” And then let the people who’re interested in those stories read them.

As I mentioned in the title, words without context are meaningless, I’ve given you a small taste of the meanings I associate with those words, however, everybody else will have their own perceptions of them. The one thing I will add is.

I don’t spend my time unnecessarily worrying about any of them. (Thinking and worrying are not the same thing.) I’ll leave you with one final thought.

What do I really know? I know very little, and even that’s drifting away as time goes by.

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You have to categorize the information you want to keep

Your wardrobe and your mind have a lot in common. If neither are organised, you’ll never find what you’re looking for when you need it.

How the memory works.

Three hours later I remembered everything. A saying far too many people recognise.

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You will stop feeling negative emotions eventually

A day will arrive when you stop feeling sadness, regret, hate, anger, jealousy or any other emotion that makes you feel like life is a chore. That will be the first day of the rest of your life, just try to make sure it’s not your last day of your life because that would be a bummer, in more ways than one.

There isn’t a secret to achieving that state of mind, all you have to do is.

Accept the life you’ve been given and allow everybody else to get on with living their own life.

“I think everybody should become rich and famous, they should do everything they’ve ever dreamed about doing so they can see it’s not the answer, it will not fill the void.” ~Jim Carrey.

Sometimes you’ve got to leave your imagined past behind you and get on with living in your present.

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